# Prayer for Torah 82

> מקור: https://rabenu.app/books/kitvey-en/82/prayer-82/

82.

God is the Master of war – His Name is god. God is mighty and strong; God is strong in battle. Master of the Universe, sublime and holy, master of wars, have mercy on me for Your Names sake; fight my wars for me. Because of my sins I have run out of strength. I haven’t the ability to stand up to my enemies, whether physical or spiritual. Woe am I. What can I say? How can I justify myself? It is an immense and awesome wonder that I can still speak to you like this and ask You to find on my behalf against all my physical and spiritual enemies.

Therefore, I have come before You, merciful One, King of Glory, Who performs wonders – teach me how to be victorious over You so that You will fight my wars Subdue, break and nullify all my enemies. Nullify from me all my evil physical cravings and all my bad attributes. Help me to rescue my soul for Your Names sake. Save me and atone for my sins. We do not depend on our righteousness rather we caste our prayers upon You in the merit of Your bountiful mercy. How can someone so lowly as myself nullify the aspect of ‘disorder,’ and turn it into ‘order’? How can I attach myself at all times to the Holy One? How can I attach my mind to the Holy One so as to really cleave to Him? When will I be able to nullify myself, all my cravings and bad attributes to the will of God completely and utterly until I become like absolutely nothing and until I achieve the aspect of ‘man’ nothing. Let me really nullify myself until everything becomes ‘orderly’. Then all the desires of my enemies will become nullified to my desire which will really be Your desire.

Master of the Universe, teach me the paths of true humility. Teach me how to break and nullify the pride from my heart and mind. The truth is that I know my own worthlessness. In the light of all my many sins, I shouldn’t have any thought of pride. I have sinned and blemished a great deal until now, even so I am not clean from thoughts of pride. I am very far away from true humility. Because of this I am far from the aspect of ‘order’, when things go well for me. I have nothing in life that runs smoothly. Everything is crooked and causes confusions. My mind gets confused from many things, especially the greed for an income. All this stems from the aspect of ‘disorder’ because I have blemished the attribute of humility and stumbled into pride, Heaven save us.

I have come before You Lord, our God, and God of our fathers, to ask that You help me and save me, in the merit and strength of the path of repentance that Moses our teacher, may he rest in peace, and all the true tzaddikim in the world drew down and revealed to us. May I also merit to return in real, whole — hearted repentance before You, from now on. You know the wonders of the paths of repentance that they drew into the world. They (the tzaddikim) lowered themselves and attached themselves to the lowest of the low, even to the lowly such as myself, wherever I am. They still attach themselves to me wherever I am now. From their point of view it is quite possible to remove me from my exile, to raise me and really bring me into holiness, to raise me higher and higher. Have mercy upon me and grant me merit to always attach myself to holy tzaddikim such as these. Reveal to me the holy path, the paths of repentance which they draw into the world, in such a way that I merit from now on to return in truly perfect repentance before You and to really attach myself and glue myself to You always, in real humbleness and self-effacement to the ultimate degree. In Your mercy, guard me and save me so that no aspect of descent or ascent will have the strength to distance me from You, Heaven forbid, for sometimes a person is distanced, Heaven forbid, by You raising him up, such as by great wealth or other good which You grant him, or by great knowledge of Your exaltedness. This happens because an excess of light darkens the eyes and harms one, Heaven forbid. Therefore I’ve come to request from You that You protect me with Your hands; guard me and save me and shield me so that nothing will harm me. May I never ever distance myself from You in the aspect of descent, Heaven forbid, even in the deepest pit, even in the ten levels of filth, God forbid. There also may I merit to always find You, as it says: “His Kingship is in every place." "In the aspect of ascent also, when You have mercy upon me and raise me higher and higher, may I always merit to find You. May I always come closer to You in all aspects, whether in the good or in distress, Heaven forbid, whether in descent or ascent, as is written; “If I ascend unto Heaven You are there; and if I make my bed in the depths, here You are." By this, may I merit, from now on and forever, to really perfect repentance, especially during the holy month of Elul, which is a month of favour, when Moses ascended to receive the Second Tablets (of the Ten Commandments) and opened a paved way for us to walk upon. From now on, have mercy upon me, so that I merit to prepare to draw upon myself the holiness of the month of Elul, the holiness of the path of repentance which Moses, our teacher, together with all the true tzaddikim in the world, drew into the world through their wonderful and awesome ways. I have no hope other than this path which is known only to You and to the great, true tzaddikim. That which is good in Your eyes do with me. I will continually hope "until the Lord looks forth and beholds from Heaven."

83.

 (a) By means of rectifying the brit (sexual purity) one can speak out words of prayer like arrows from a bow. Then begins the growth of the horn of Mashiach. Then one comes to the holiness of Shabbat and becomes a free man and merits to the ultimate knowledge. As a result, he can discard his leprous body which is from the skin of the Serpent and wear the clothes of Shabbat. In other words, he will have a holy body from the Garden of Eden and then his fortune will rise and he will merit to wealth; his good urge will become strengthened and thus sadness and mockery will be nullified. Through this he will raise all those who have fallen to lowly, bad forms of love and fear. He raises them to holy love and fear and thus removes the darkness from their eyes. Then their eyes will see wonders and it will be considered as if he had created the world. By this he raises all the supplications and requests that we pray. We awaken the redemption which depends on the heart and nullify the yeast and chometz of the evil inclination of a person that remains from his youth. Then the heart can become enthused in the study of Torah with flames of love. 'Many waters', which are the extraneous forms of love and fear, will not be able to extinguish this holy enthusiasm. The Shechinah covers over with its wings the blood of the Jewish People with this love so that no evil seed, the waters of the Flood, will overcome them. To all this we merit through the rectification of the brit.

(b) Yeast and chometz are in the heart of a person. They entice a person to have doubts about the Torah scholars of the generation, saying that 'this one is pleasant and that one is not pleasant'. By rectifying the brit we nullify this yeast and chometz.